It’s finally here—

To make the official sandwich of Adam DeMamp, combine these ingredients in classic sandwich formation—

• Texas Toast (or in a pinch, any bread toasted and sliced as big as Texas)
• Prosciutto (handful)
• Provolone Cheese (to taste)
• Pulled Pork (as available)
• Pickled Spicy Peppers (four P’s that please)
• Spicy Brown Mustard

There it is.  No veggies clogging the way.  No lettuce filling the arteries.  Just the meat and potatoes (NOTE: no potatoes are in the sandwich) of an All American Meal.

The sandwich built for a DeMampwich.  They’ll serve it on trays at my funeral.  Maybe they’ll do the same at your funeral, or the funeral of a close friend.

I think this is just the type of food that’ll change the world.  That is, until I announce DeMampwich II.

3rdofmay:

The art: Matt Johnson, Breadface, 2004. The work is made of cast plastic and oil paint.

The news: This week NPR’s Fresh Air is featuring a week of programs on food. Food is one of Western art’s classic subjects, so MAN will feature a special food post each day. Today: Slices of bread. Think of them as post-war American art’s take on the classic, food-packed Dutch or French still-life. For more on the subject — and some of the artworks featured here today, see this post on Modern Art Notes and a smart response from Kriston Capps.

The source: Hammer Museum, which featured Breadface in the 2005 exhibition “Thing: New Sculptures from Los Angeles.” The show was curated by James Elaine, Aimee Chang and Christopher Miles.

Note: An apparent, er, cousin of Breadface appeared in a Nissan commercial the year after the work was on view at the Hammer…

My buddy Goons just sent me this, and as he expected, I’m PISSED.  I was the king of the sandwich-rip apart face-maker since 2nd grade, and now this guy is calling it ART?!?!  

Respect the classics, bro.  Know where you came from.  I’m bread-face sandwich KING.  If this is sold, I think it’s fair I get at least 51%.  On PRINCIPLE ALONE.